Happy Tuesday, sweet friends. How are you? Whatcha been up to? — I’m still trying to hang in there for sure!! 🥴 I hope you’re staying smart and staying safe out there!
Growing up, I literally hated when bad stuff happened to me. Well, I’m sure you’re thinking, ‘Duh, Jaz. Who WANTS bad stuff to happen to them? That doesn’t make any sense.’ Like I always say, track with me…..I guess what I’m really trying to say is that once I really gave my life to Christ, I REALLY hated when bad stuff would happen to me. It’s probably because I figured once I fully surrendered and took this walk seriously, that I would become ‘immune’ to the craziness of the world, at least the major stuff. Like, all the bad stuff from before would go away and that I would just have this new super Christian shield to block all of the bad stuff.
Then I found myself knowing that I had big dreams, but my reality consistently didn’t seem to provide a road in that direction. Like in the slightest. Then my stepdad packed his bags and walked out on us while we were at my great-uncle’s funeral to never return. Then a few years later, I found myself in an even more humbling work environment as an Assistant Manager at a clothing store with a WHOLE college degree. And the debt to show for it. Talk about a HUMBLING SEASON. Fast forward a year, my baby cousin, my high school best friend, my grandmother, and my current best friend, all died, in the same year! Then……fast-forward a year later, I land in the ER because of huge fibroids that tried to threaten my ability to have children. WHAT?! Where’s my ‘super-Christian-bad-stuff-blocker-shield’ when I needed it.
Now, hear me out, in the midst of all of those moments, all which aren’t even listed here, there were plenty of incredibly good moments too. However, I will say that I never would have thought that I would have seen what I’ve seen before even turning 30 years old. And to be honest with you at the time, I kinda got used to it. It was normal, but not at the same time. With no real understanding of it or even a desire to walk it out the way that God wanted me to. But even in those moments, He never let go of my hand. Looking back, I saw His hand with me all along.
As I walked through those moments, my prayers started to change. My perspective started to change. I started to walk through these challenges, or trials as stated in the Bible, with a viewpoint of trusting and recognizing that the purpose of my faith extends so much further than me just reuniting with the Father at the end of this life. My pain’s actually meant to be leveraged with those who don’t even know His name or have walked as away from Him, as we all have at one point. I was talking to a friend a few months back and I remember saying to her ‘we are useless in the faith if we can’t relate to the people we’re called to love’. I don’t just mean a spouse or those closest to us, but also those new to our lives or even those most difficult to love. The ones who feel like God hates them. The one who feels like He’s completely left them. Who doesn’t feel like they even have a reason for existence. Those people.
Why would I listen to someone who’s never even touched a car in their life tell me how to fix mine? 🤔It’s like those people who try their hardest to understand what you’re going through without ever having LIVED through it. You appreciate their compassion, but they won’t ever really understand.
Our testimony makes us a walking billboard to those around us. We get to show others that no one is exempt from the tough things in life, however, we get to lean on the One who can walk with us through them, and also reach those who have yet to understand. Now, even in the midst of my humanity that feels hurt and pain just like everyone else, I look at a new trial as an opportunity to reach another audience of people that are dealing with what I’m dealing with. It’s like adding to my spiritual resume if you will. lol.
‘Lost a friend? Yea, I’ve lived through that, here’s how God was there for me.’ - ‘Oh, you struggle with rejection? I have too when my ‘dad’ walked out on us….here’s how God has healed me from that.’ The list really goes on y’all. As I continue to take one more step forward, I’m continuously reminded of how faithful God has been to me, how much He loves me, and how I get to actively participate in sharing Him with the world. What a gift! — Don’t be so hard on yourself if you’re not there yet. It’s all about ebbs and flows, one day at a time.
So I challenge you today, think about all that you have been through. There is a God that loves you so much and wants to use your pain for something so much greater than you could ever imagine. No moment is wasted in His hand. No hope is lost in His hand. 😉He wants to use your story, will you let Him?
As always, I pray you are well, I love you much, and if you haven’t gotten caught up on the podcast episodes, WHAT ARE YOU EVEN DOING?! lol. Check them out, we put our love into them. ❤️
Talk soon friends.
-j.